Renegade Runner

My first trip to the gym in... two? Nope. Three months... Finally. And I lied, I actually went to the gym once in those 3 months, but I ended up just sitting in the cafe and eating. Like a hungry lifting fool who just maxed out in a hard core lifting session, and yet I had just walked in and sat down. Whew. Handing the front desk worker my card to swipe really wiped me out! Totally deserves a smoothie, sandwich, and a cookie!

I have been in denial of my pathetic-ness for about the same amount of months. There was something about my attitude that kept me in a state of flat out stupidity and I just refused to believe I had gone that far from what I wanted to be. Then, like so many times, Derick brought me back. This is why he amazes me-

Early Morning Conversation:
Derick- "Let's make a goal chart for the next 5 days and see if you can do it."
Lauren- "Why? I get out the door and run... most of the time."
D- "Well, you could be doing a little more."
L- "WHAT? For real? My hamstring just won't get any better, it is hard to run and all that stuff when your hamstring hurts that much, jeez."
D- "You could be doing some things to help your injury..."
L- "Like what? Foam roll, totally do that...ah sometimes. And I know I need to do more core, I just don't like that stuff. Its... hard."
D- "It will help you run better."
L- "Gah, well I don't have time. I have to cook, work, clean, and do all this stuff! When am I supposed to do this?"
D- "I will help. I'll cook on the nights you get home late so you don't have to worry. I just want you to be able to look back in a few years and know that you gave everything you could to be the best runner you could. I'm not trying to make you do anything you don't want to, and if you are happy where you are at right now, then we are right where we should be. But if you want more, work for it."

Who in the heck says that? Right, my incredible bearded wonder. See how carefully he leads me to my major realization? He lets me complain, lets me get all the crap out, and then, BOOM, wakes me up!

I became quite the whiner some where in the last year and Derick has slowly tried to help me steer back in the right direction. I sat there, curled up on the floor after a 4 mile run, and realized that I could not look back on what I was doing so far and be satisfied with it. I couldn't even be proud of my last 365 days. Perspective usually comes with time, and my timing could be viewed as both late and early. It has taken me a year of doing the same lazy routine to realize that it is not helping and I can't get faster with it. Wimping out for a whole year is pretty bad. On the other hand, I didn't need a lifetime to realize that I have more to give, more to run, and more to discover. Thank goodness Derick has his mature moments side. :)

Totally my choice. I can look back and have to be happy with where I am, or not be satisfied and I can create a stronger me. That is the theme for this season- take everything that I think is too hard and do it. A month ago, everything I tried to do made me more tired. This week, I did my Running Fit class with Run On! and I went to the gym. I had forgotten how great a lifting session could feel. Something has definitely changed. Earlier in the year I wanted to go out and do some of the strengthening work outs, but I was exhausted. Now, something is finally clicking and it feels good to make my arms sore. I have missed that feeling so much. I know I finally made the choice to make a solid effort, but it feels different this time. Sore and tired is so different from wiped out and exhausted.

Could it possibly mean I am finally adapting to life after college? I have heard it can take up to two years from other runners who have gone through it before. Sounds about right. I just can't believe the difference that I felt. The past year I was sleeping awfully, eating terribly, and not doing the extremely important "little things". Am I sleeping better? Nope. Eating better? Possibly, but not consistently yet. Doing the non-running workouts? Starting the routine. The future may not look better yet, but today sure looks a hell of a lot better.

This isn't an I'm-ready-for-the-Olympic-trials realization, but it is definitely a ready-to-be-the-best-runner-I-can-be sort of deal. And I am going to need some majorly awesome music blasting through my headphones in order to make this happen. Also, I took it as a sign at the gym when Forrest Gump was playing on the televisions they had up. Let's see what can happen when I finally have some steam behind my miles...

Some of the most truthful advice I have gotten in the past year:
"Real elite athletes don't have real jobs Lauren. All they do is run, train, and have more talent than you. So, you can't really work a real job and think you can compete with them."
---Luckily, I love a challenge, and that sure sounds like a great one. Plus, I'm not trying to compete with them (yet). I just need my two feet to take me as fast as they can. My real job will just have to pay the bills until my feet can.

On my way to becoming, in all ways, a Renegade Runner...
Bring the miles
Bring the challenges
Bring the reasons
Bring the hurt
And I'll bring the Renegade
(with smiles)

And the Turkey Trotted, Thought, and Thanked

Today is the day of feathers. By that, I mean today is Thanksgiving and no matter what kind of feathered wings you have, the best way to make room for all the wonderful food, family, and fun you will have on this day is to get outside and enjoy a RUN! Thanksgiving does not care if your feathers are worn out. Nor does this holiday mind if your feathers are a bit out of shape. Those wings of yours can be new, flashy, dusty, sharpened, tired, dirty, and/or downright developed but this holiday will take you. If you show the holiday some love with a little jog, it will love you right back. It will love you with creamy potatoes, sweeter than candy corn, mouthwatering turkey, unstoppable stuffing, and a whole buffet of desserts. So. Much. Love.

So today Derick, Sherlock, and I all went to the San Antonio Road Runner's Turkey Trot in Mcallister Park to stretch out our little feathers. I was first there to hand out some race fliers, but at the last second I couldn't resist the chance to keep the traditional turkey trot running streak alive. Luckily, even on race day at 8:33 am (the actual 4 mile race starts at 9 am) the race only costs 10 dollars to register! Great deal there! We parked at Blossom Athletic Complex and decided to run over to the park and use it as a warm up. The total mileage from our car to the actual starting line was almost perfectly 2 miles! Warm up- check! A little birdie had told us that the park was going to be shut down to all cars anyways so that the shuttle buses and necessary vehicles could have easy access to the roads and get all the racers to the starting line on time. It only took a few feet into the park to realize this had not been enforced. People were streaming in to the park in all sorts of ways- on foot, bike, and vehicle. The crowding had begun and was complicated by the people who decided to leave their cars inside the actual park. This makes it almost impossible for the shuttle buses to get through the park and drop off the racers fast enough! But besides the hassle of getting to and from the race, we had a great time!

The SARR Turkey Trot features a 4 mile course (3.87 mile by my garmin this morning!) that takes you through a fun portion of the paved trails in Mcallister park. There are some narrow spots and a few sharp turns, but the course is actually fairly nice. The park is a sort of twisted pretty. After doing the course for the second year, I am able to say it is well marked and the directors always have a blast starting the race. This year though, I almost missed a turn right before the three mile marker, but it was my own mistake and not for lack of flour markings. :) The mile markers were a bit off, but how many races like this do you think have actual accurate markers? Hell, how many races like this have markers? They start the race in waves, because of how tight the starting line is and the number of participants in the race. While our little race does not get the numbers like Houston and Dallas, the number jumped up to 3000+ runners and walkers this year! Big jump from last year, as the same number of total participants from last year had pre-registered this year! As the number of participants goes up, it may get harder to enjoy. The paths are probably wide enough to squeeze 4 runners across, but strangers racing together always mean a few less can fit because of boundary issues and courtesy. I already had to weave quite a bit through most of the race, and I started in the first wave (my fault for not getting out quick enough!)

Even if the number of participants keep rising for this race (like I think they will), the run over-all is worth, for traditions sake, the strategic planning and parking hassle required. The group that puts the race together puts in a lot of hard work and tries very hard to make sure people are having fun! The door prize turkeys are a great little extra flair as well. I also can't wait for the photos from the race! I noticed a girl running with an awesome turkey headband on the top of her head and would love to see it again!

I ended up finishing with a 24:39 for the 4-ish :) mile run. Not a terrible day for me. But by no means was it a rock-solid performance. I realized how much work I have to do over the next couple months! That is more helpful, to me, than running a super fast time! While I was just a hair faster than last year (still, 24 minutes is plenty of time to think), I am on much more shaky ground. A few work outs have been completed, but I can't seem to shake a nagging hamstring injury that keeps resurfacing from a race last March. I also struggled through my summer runs and the cross country season. I competed in one road 10k and in an alumni cross country race over that season and ended up with the same result- a stressed out hamstring and a questioning glance towards my future. I know I was more fit at this time last year, so it is time to put my nose to the grindstone and see what kind of a track season I can actually have!

DPU XC ALUMNI RACE 2011-
GIBSON FAMILY XC COURSE,
TERRE HAUTE, INDIANA

What ever the type of season I make for myself this year, I am so thankful to have the opportunity to keep running. While it doesn't always feel like the competitive and glamorous life I was picturing after graduating, I still am going to races and getting that same nerve rush before lacing up my shoes and putting on my uniform! I still have a goal to improve and to always do my best. My lack of blog updates has shown how much I have been taking for granted. That passion that I counted on through college and the time that I had  to dedicate are all things I struggle with now. But just when I don't think I have any reason to run, something always shows me that I am not done yet. What ever I can do this season I am dedicating to my sister, Deanna. She is an incredible basketball player at Adams State College. In her years as a Grizzly I have seen De become a force as a leader, player, and student-athlete. She has so much more ahead of her and I can't thank her enough for always continuing to inspire me and push me to be that athlete and person that she is. While she doesn't deserve the challenges placed in front of her this year, she is the only person I know who can handle, rise above, and use them to make her stronger. So that is what my goal is, to take my challenges, problems, and set backs and do what my sister does- come back even stronger from them! (De you truly are an incredible person and I am so thankful to have you as my sister!)

I am slowly finding the running community I was hoping to be a part of and I am so thankful for the groups out of Run On!, Trinity University, and my friends and family spread all across the world for helping me build up to becoming a better runner. Thank you for giving me a job, the support, and a hope for the future.

Derick, you always need to be thanked. I think I do a pretty good job of it, but I know  your ego won't mind a little more! Thank you for wanting what I can't sometimes and for staying tough with me!

Thank you legs for giving me the miles I want, the heart I need, and the dedication I crave. (Eventually...)

Giving thanks with smiles
And surviving the miles
Trot on, feathered friends...

Gearing Up

I may have graduated, but I still believe in back to school shopping. I figure, I am working just as hard as I did in school, so I deserve to gear up for a new season and a new year. Only now everything seems to be running orientated... go figure.

Purchases in order to be properly prepared:

Gary Garmin

This is the reason why my new favorite number is 610. Meet Gary, my new training partner! I have decided to upgrade from a regular Soleus timing watch to the big daddy- the newest touch screen Garmin Forerunner 610. So far I have absolutely loved it. Besides being slightly depressed after realizing how slow I actually do most of my runs, I am in obsession mode. I can tell my cadence with the foot pod and I am getting some of the first heart rate feedback I have had in many years. Lots of information all at my fingertips. The best part is that I get to upload all the info my 610 gives me right to the training log I have been using for 5 years- Logarun. It has been a great way for me to log/journal/record all of the stuff I have trouble remembering. I can't express how important it is as a runner to keep track of things like your mileage, sleep habits, weight, weather, and the way you felt after races and work outs. You can see patterns and habits that you may not be able to see with out a log. Some of it seems like common sense, but we all know how easy it is to let life just kind of rough us up a bit. PS- the graphics and the way Garmin Connect sets up the website and info is really great! I love the map of the route I ran. I can see everything! Plus, it is so much thinner than any of the GPS watches I had seen. Fits my little wrist just right!

Fire, as worn by the Asics DS Trainer

Of course, in a healthy relationship it is only fair that you give as much (or more) as you receive! So my surprise for Derick was a new pair of DS Trainers! They were perfect Trinity colors. He used to run in these and while he has a new pair of running shoes (see below!) now I figured they would make a great coaching shoe! He fought me a bit on the size (he has worked at a running store as well, if you are in Ohio go here: Columbus Running Company) but I won. They are just a color update to the DS Trainers set out this year, but I loved the red. I am still waiting on feedback from Derick, but he has worn them a couple times. They have to compete with the new wear test shoes that Puma sent him and his new running shoes(New Balance Road Minimus) but I think he likes them.

New shoes+ Old feelings = minimalist

Enter Derick's new running shoes. He has never really been a minimalist runner, buuuut I have been begging him to get new shoes for a while and these are what he went with. The New Balance Minimus. I have had a pair for a while and I just use them for work. After my race at Jon's Run, I realized that my feet are not quite as young as they used to be and I need to be careful of which shoes I run in. For me to transition into minimalist running, I have to take a very cautious and slow approach. Derick, on the other hand has been wearing the same pair of DS Trainers and old Puma flats for years. That is basically like running minimalist- no cushioning and most of the support is long gone. The Road Minimus basically feels like a racing flat, for those of you who are familiar with light weight shoes, and Derick has been able to just start running in them and not look back. I am a bit jealous! My Brooks Adrenalines and I will always be best for each other, but I miss the days where I could pop on a pair of flats or spikes and just run fast for a bit. Derick hasn't complained one bit about the lack of cushioning or flat feel. I tried to get him to grab a pair of the NB 1190's but he stayed solid on wanting the Minimus. Runners who are wanting a great transition shoe in the minimalist world would be very happy with the road or trail Minimus. New Balance has done a great job of re-vamping their style, approach, fit, and technology to be on a whole new edge of running.

Minimalist by heart,
but nature calls for a little help for my feet

The other side of New Balance: Trail Minimus. This is the new women's color and they were great at work today! I have a pair of the Road Minimus, and I have been so in love with them I refused to go to the other side! Until today. The fit is very different than any shoe I have had. Automatically I want to stand differently when I slip the shoes on. With very little heel, my feet sit flatter on the floor and I use my forefoot more. In some of my other work shoes, I get some pain in the balls of my feet because the taller heel shifts my weight a bit forward and I put a lot of weight on that part of my foot. While I can't run in a minimalist shoe, I can still benefit from wearing them at work! They help my posture at work and while my calves were sore after the first few times that I wore them, they feel much better now.

More my speed

The Nike Lunarglide was the first shoe I purchased at Run On! when I got the job. Generally, in retail, you should get used to wearing the product that you sell. My first day I showed up in a pair of Derick's Pumas. We don't have a single thing by Puma in our entire inventory... I had to catch up quick! My old closet of shoes used to include about a 75/25 ratio of dress shoes to running shoes. I really only needed one good pair of training shoes and a pair to race in. Now, I actually forgot that I still have a pair of cute boots and at least one pair of heels in my closet. I am in running shoes almost 24/7 now. The ratio has tipped quite heavily towards the cushioned, supportive, and colorful athletic footwear! I have become such a huge shoe nerd. For 6 years, I was strictly a Brooks loyalist. Still loyal, but quite curious now, I have explored and found many shoes that I like the feel of. The fun part has been being able to try the different shoes on my runs and workouts. The Lunarglide has been a great shoe. First time on they seem to have a semi-firm feel. But walk around in them for a day and you feel them soften right up! One of my favorite work shoes and a shoe I can run in on lighter days.  

The Sacrowedgy

You can not overlook injury prevention when you start running again. With some of the back pain and sciatica I have been having, Derick recommended the Sacrowedgy. I ended up needing the guys version as a "taller slender female" because my hips apparently are "shaped more like a male" as the instruction manual puts it. It was "a more natural and comfortable fit"...It is a pretty awkward device but I haven't used it enough to tell what the difference is. The goal is to help situate the hips like a sports medicine or a chiropractor does. I will keep you updated on the results of this fun-looking device. 

Kettle Bell does not equal Kettle Corn

The final purchase we made was a little Kettle Bell. While I try to stay motivated and get to the gym, I don't always have that much energy. Body weight has always been enough for me, but I have seen the light. The lifting light. I feel strong is when my arms can match the effort of my legs and my heart. Apparently, I don't weigh enough make that happen. The Kettle Bell helps with that. At least I can look at it now and remember that if I was motivated enough to buy it, then I will sometimes have enough motivation to use it!



GIGI'S CUPCAKES

Of course after a long day of shopping and gearing up for the upcoming season, it is easy to have your energy sources depleted! Simple solution: EAT AT GIGI'S CUPCAKES! They are amazing and I have eaten way to many of them. Easily my favorite is the Red Velvet Cupcake. Beware, they only make certain cupcakes on certain days. But just look at the pictures...the frosting is taller than the cakes and I would run a very long distance to have these amazing little things.  

Also- I have a wish list of other things I am waiting to gear up on. Next on my list is the Stunt Puppy leash so Derick and I can run hands free with Sherlock.

The Stunner

Freaky Friday

The past few days I have been feeling pretty awful. My work outs were getting worse instead of better and everything just seems harder than normal. Not really the norm for me. I must have peed in a magic water fountain or opened a cursed fortune cookie and switched places with this other person I have been. Obviously these are the only logical explanations. Or maybe I tied my shoes the wrong way...

I was debating on what to do: take time off and give myself some rest or try and push though.

One of the toughest things to do in running is to figure out what pain is OK and what exhaustion level is OK. And where to draw the line. Even if you are being a good little consistent runner, the line is never consistent. One day, you are pushing through a calf cramp and a month later it is a torn hamstring. You fight being tired only to end up tapped out, burnt out. How can you tell what to run through?

Mostly, I think it is an individual choice. Since I believe that our choices help make us who we are, I take most of mine pretty seriously. So, it is hard to approach a choice of running or taking time off- except for SAS, I don't really want to be thought of as weak! But that leaves only one option: run through everything. Force it. Force it to work. Force your way through the hard, the tough, and the ugly. I always believed the right things would happen if I just made the tough choices.

One problem: Force is not the same as Confidence. Forcing your way through a work out means you can only do just that. Use force and get through. Force it till you can make it. Only this isn't a reality TV show and you can't just "fake it till you make it". Force is not fight, nor is it heart. It just is. The force I am talking about is not the drone defeating, Darth Vader slaying, Obi Wan Kenobi force. This is the dark side force. The one that should hardly ever be used. Forcing a work out, forcing that second run, forcing those drills can be the very thing that makes you weaker. Not stronger. The mental edge you could lose is not worth the physical gain.

At least to me, the key is to build those things into your routine. That is where the gain lies- building yourself into something instead of trying to bend yourself around some sort of plan. This past year I have forced a lot of things. Everything from mileage to recovery. I haven't built very much of anything. It is true that I have been trying to work on my weaknesses, but I feel like I have lost touch with my strengths. Example A: I am super at recovering, if I give myself time to do so. Doubling every day has left me more exhausted than anything I have ever done. That includes the SCAC meet where I ran the 1500m, 800m, and 5k all in the span of a few hours and lived. I was less tired then than I am now after some of my simple 40/20s. It is not really the doubling, but the fact that I am not giving myself the correct time to recover. There lies my one of my problems. I am forcing too much work. I wanted to be good really really fast. So just do it all at once, right?

Why would I have to force something I love to do, you ask? Well, simple. 'Tis because I have been fighting myself the whole way. My comfort zone is in middle distance work. Short. Quick. Painful. But over rapidly. My mental edge has always been in trying to stay stronger than my competitor just long enough to finish up the race. Try doing that in any distance over a mile...hard stuff. You have to have something else to keep you going. Confidence. Drive. Heart. And lots of Fire. You also have to have more than 30 miles a week. Switching gears like that has taken me to a whole new level of strength I didn't know I had, but it has called my lazy butt out on all the little things I never took that seriously. I did just enough core to keep my IT Band from flaring up. Just enough arm strengthening to keep me strong down the last stretch. Doesn't really scream FIRE at you does it? I wanted to be fast, I didn't understand everything it would take to get there.

While I may have lost sight of a few of my goals lately, and I have been struggling to keep my motivation up, I am definitely learning a lot. I know the base I have gained over the past year has been great. I know that forcing myself through some of those work outs showed me I can really do well at distances over 1500m! That is a huge step for me! My idea of rhythm during a work out used to be hitting 67's for 4x400 and calling it a night. Now I understand there is this wonderful groove that you can find during a tempo that takes you farther and faster than you think you can go. Taking the splits for those longer distances is addicting. You want to keep edging a little more time off each mile. I have definitely found my heart in some of those work outs and found a love for distances I never thought I would want to meet.

I am also learning a lot by reading what other runners are going through. My favorite runner used to be Shannon Rowbury. While she still has this special place in my mind, I have a few others making their way to the front of my inspiration block. I have been reading Lauren Fleshman's blog and I have to say I am a bit obsessed. Her attitude towards running and life has made me laugh, cry, and hope. She is an incredible runner and if I could end up with a shadow of her life I would be doing pretty well. There are runners everywhere trying to make the most of their legs. Runner's dreams riding on 10 toes, the strength of their bones, and the power and endurance in their muscles. While we are all taking different paths and running different roads, many of us hope to end up on the same track. Most professional runners seem to have had some sort of injury before, so at least I know I am not alone there! I have a long way to go until I even somewhat resemble a professional athlete, but until then, I will just say I am a pro runner trapped in a jogger's body. And smile on. With the help of people like Taylor Penrod at least I can look good while I do it!  

And one final note of good news- after spending a whole summer in Texas believing our apartment was supposed to get really hot over the summer, Derick and I now have a fully functioning air conditioner! I no longer wake up sweating unless I have the terrible "Revenge of the Runner Buns" dream again.

Calling All Tigers

*Black & Gold Tigers skip down to the ********** segment if you would like
*Maroon Tigers read from here :)

So San Antonio has been pretty desolate since the exiting of the Trinity senior class of 2011.

Graduation meant that it would be mostly Derick, Sherlock, and holding down the fort around town. The seniors were leaving and all the underclassmen were headed back to their families for the summer. While my summer has been wonderfully substantiated by moments of absolute Joy, literally- fun times with Joy Lindig, classes need to start so that everyone has to come back. It. Is. Time.

Thus, TUXC, here is a list of things I will need in the next few months:
-Main Street Pizza Outings (Derick... ahem... Coach Lawrence hasn't taken me out at alllllllll)
-Long Runs (preferrably fun routes we come up with- Contour and Dick F. are even more boring over the summer)
-Awkward Meetings With The New Freshmen (Who is that girl? Didn't she already graduate from school? Why is she still hanging around the team? What do we call her? So she's engaged to the coach?)
-Five Guys Outings (Yes James Woolley!)
-Pre-Meet Pasta Nights (Obvious- you all have to fuel up some how)
-A Partner For My Core Routine (ROSEMARY PLEASE COME BACK!!!)
-DoubleDaves Outings (notice how many references to food there are?)
-T-Shirt Making, Craft Forming, Girls Talking Nights (I am tired of beards and boys)
-Visits At Run On! (I am there 40 hours a week but still make it out to practice with you all, we have to meet in the middle somehow!)
-Meets, Invites, and Championships To Bring Out My Inner-Cheerleader Again (Seriously, my lungs are weak, and so is my cheer face)
-Luch Dates ANYWHERE (my grown up tastebuds are returning)
-Ultimate Frisbee Games (So I have something other to watch than Netflix)
-Team Dating (I have mine, go get yours)
-MARK GREENE (btw how was China?)
-The Antics of Sal & Pancho (You gentlemen and your short shorts do amuse)
-A Dogsitter/Housesitter/Cooking Teacher (Derick and I both FAIL)
-Work Outs WITH PEOPLE (Yes, Yes, UCL, the Golf Course, and Brackenridge will still be here)
-A Reason To Wear Something Other Than Running Clothes (I don't care if you have a band concert, art opening, or want to feed pigeons in the park- hold me accountable!)
-(And Finally) A Reason To Get Up Before 7 AM (serious laziness going on down here and it is too hot for that)

Also, I have some promises to make. If you all come back SOON I promise to:
-Try not to talk about "the good ol'days" and that-one-school-I-graduated-from all the time
-Not rant about the Barefoot movement, how big my feet have gotten, or the fun customers I get in the store
-Make it out to as many meets as possible this year
-Cheer my face off
-Eat my face off
-Actually have my Focus on Form days***COMING SOON to a track near you :)
-Take you on bird runs/walks (I know this is a big reason you guys are rushing back)
-Give you some great motivation!

SO HURRY!!!!
*********************************************************************************

For the Tigers in stripes that are not so Maroon, I hope you all know how much I miss you. I see you all growing your own traditions and moving to such an awesome level. Since I won't get to see my Gold & Black blood for SCAC, I may just have to find a flight out to good old Greencastle. The call is still there for you and I hope you still see it in what I write. The ages before you live on (we exist I promise!) through everything you guys do. Even all the way in Texas I can feel the heart, see the drive, and hear the passion that the team has. You guys face a new conference but you are armed with the right stuff to run with confidence and power. Remember the people you have supporting you- alumni everywhere cheering, family and friends pushing for you, the amazing coaching staff, and each other. Fight, run, hope, cheer, and dominate with each other. I can't wait to see how you all do. Thankfully, my stalking skills are still up to par.

To all the freshman I don't know- have a blast and love the run. The best thing I ever did my freshman year was drop in on Coach Stoffregen and just chat with him. We did that all four years and I ran faster than I ever thought I could. You want to improve? Talk. Chat. Discuss. Ask questions. And MOST important- LISTEN. The first time I really sat down with coach I asked him how he thought I was doing. He said fine, but I asked what else he wanted to say. I had heard his hesitation. He told me he thought I could work harder in practice. No one had said that to me for a long time, but he got me hungry and reminded me that this was a new level and that required more than ever! It was a suprise for me to hear I wasn't working hard enough, but if I wouldn't have stepped up my game that year I wouldn't have won Conferences as a freshman! Listen and talk to Coach Stoffregen. It makes a world of difference in your development as a college athlete and a person. (Also, laugh at his jokes- make sure he still has some good ones)

Get ready for an amazing year!

Handled

Race DAY!

Always fun, even if you don't really feel prepared!

This Sunday Derick and I decided to do the THTH Race sponsored, timed, and made awesome by Run On! It is called Too Hot To Handle for a reason- it takes place in July in Texas. Luckily the race started at 7:30 am, so we could actually survive and didn't have to rename the race "Too Hot to Handle so We Took a Ride in an Ambulance". Plus the weather was somewhat nice to us and the first half of our race was hleped out with some amazing cloud cover!

After the race-
both of us were happy
to be done with the hills!

The race was at Boerne City Lake in Boerne, Texas. If you have never been, the park is pretty awesome- trails, roads, and a lake to jump in! Perfect if you are a trialthlete! (Emily Watts- you should come visit me and check the place out!) I first visited the place to help out at the Tall Texan Triathlon and saw how great the place is if you need to get multiple modes of training in all in one location. Today we would only be utilizing the running aspect of the park. It was time to get our Run On!

With the AMAZING Mary Hamm-
One of the toughest people I know!

THTH features both a 5k and a 15k along Upper Cibilo Creek Road right outside the park. Both the 5k and 15k start at the same time and follow the same course- the 5k flips after halfway on an out and back course while the 15k runners get to keep heading out through the outskirts of Boerne. Derick and I both did the 15k and the racers stayed on the same road for an out and back course except for one right turn at mile 5-6 for an add on loop before heading back to the main road and the park.

My goal was to start the race around 7 minute pace and see how I handled the distance. This would be my longest race ever (if you don't count the half marthon I did with a friend back in December) and I was feeling less than prepared for the race. My work out earlier in the week had consisted of a sad little tempo where Derick destroyed me and my shufflebutt-hip complex beat me to pieces mentally and physically. While I knew my hip couldn't take the speed of competing in the 5k yet, I knew I was not in the right kind of shape to handle such a long race in the 15k either. But what coach says goes, so I put on my regular training shoes (I am ever so thankful for my pair of Brooks Adrenaline running shoes) instead of my racing flats hoping they would help me actually finish the distance!

After the gun went off and Derick pushed up to the front of the pack, I was left to wonder how the race was actually going to play out. I think one of the fun parts about the race was that everyone had the same kind of bib numbers. Some races have different bibs for the people doing different distances. Today, no one could tell who was doing which race (until we passed the 5k turnaround of course)! Derick and I were probably in the top 20 to start, and I was trying to be a bit more conservative, but I couldn't tell who was in the 5k and who was 15k! The pace at the front seemed like they might be doing the 5k, but I couldn't decide who. I was the only girl in the group until this sweet young lady caught up to me- Devin Clark, the womens over all winner in the 5k (she's only 14!!!). I told her to go catch the boys once we saw them turn around at the 5k flip. I was not-so-secretly wishing I could flip around with her! The boys in the lead were not too far in front of us and it would have been a lot of fun chasing them down.... but my path for the day was much longer.

I think some people call it character building? I think I would call it a gut check. Passing that turn around was a hard thing to do. I had to go against everything I am used to doing- short and fast. I was going to have to figure out what it would take to get me to the finish line of three 5k's in a row! It helped that Derick was in front and I could still see him for some of the race. The course was condusive to keeping a good rhythm because there were hills intermixed with some awesome straights to always give yourself a way to get your legs back. Plus, no one really had an advantage that way- if you were great at hills there were plenty for you to work, but there were also those flat fast zones too for people who could just roll. After the first 2 miles I was basically by myself and just trying not to let the guys I could see in front of me get any farther away. 

The Run On! Chicken-
Competed in the 5k

I ended up catching two guys (one being the D-rock) but the men up front were flying and ended the race in a 52 minute something time! So fast! It was fun to see them at all the turn-arounds with the lead bike, they were so smooth. My legs held together to average 6:36 mile pace for the 15k. My splits showed the two hills I had a tough time with and did some soul searching on, but my last mile was in 6:06 and reminded me that I haven't totally switched over to the dark side (the darks side meaning distances over a 5k!). The 1:01:38 it took me to finish the course got me 8th place overall and I was the first woman by 14 minutes or so. Derick ended up finishing in 1:03 and still had a smile on his face (at least for pictures). For his first race back, after running when ever he felt like it for preparation, he did pretty decent! Results up: 15k Overall.

My hip is extrememly stiff and sore the day after, but that is to be expected when I had to race off to work after the event was over! I have been seeing a chiropractor, Dr. Vanessa Vajdos and she has been helping put me back together a bit! She seriously cured the head cold I had for the whole week in one visit and made my hip run-able again. We went to see her because she is a runner herself! She won the Houston Marathon in 1980 and was sponsored by Nike! It was really fun to pick her brain, ask for advice, and hear about some major history on the running scene. Her coach Al Lawrence wrote a book that Derick has had for a while and her picture is in it with all her training! Now it has a fresh autograph on it from Dr. Vajdos! She knew a lot about the runners of her time and some awesome stories. She also gave great advice! :) My favorite part was when I asked her how hard it was to get sponsored and try the competitive running thing. She let me in on a few secrets....

Still banged up, still hoping, still running, and still smiling...

THTH you have been HANDLED

Life Goals

So a year in "limbo" as I am calling it seems to be long enough. It is time to set some goals. Evaluate what my actions are saying. See what choices I would like to make. I have been feeling a bit trapped by the lack of ways I can distinguish time. There are no semesters, no summer breaks, and not my regular fall cross country and spring track seasons to mark the passage of a year for me. My goals were always short term- next season, next race, next visit home, next team meeting, next class, next test, next summer job. The long term things always seemed to just work out for me. I had the easy four year goal of graduation. Another easy goal was finding a job. But now what? An entire year has gone by and I have very little to show for it. (Example: there is a large lack of planning going on for that wedding thing)

Realization #1- Since my life is no longer dictated by summer breaks and school semesters, my years are finally free.
-I am not limited to a 365 day plan.
-My goals have to be shaped differently and have a little more direction because of the freedom from restraints
-The easy road is the one already paved. Trying to carve semesters and school time periods into this time in my life is destroying what I have been released from. Wishing for college again because I didn't have to worry about what the next year would mean is WIMPY. Time to suck it up and find who I thought I discovered in college.

Realization #2- A lack of confidence is detrimental to goal setting, relationship building, and being able to perform consistently.
-Cutting myself down is an easy way to always be happy with what ever result
-Really common in my running attitude
-Easy way out, WIMPY again
-I know there is a believer in me still

It is new for me to try and think so far ahead, meaning more than a year in the future, so I have to take baby steps. If I can work on my two realizations above, my goals and efforts will be a bit more productive and then I can work on more.

Life Goals
- Short Term:
    Do my shufflebutt exercises everyday
    Practice patience with my dog and keep him smiling
    Take more photographs
    Explore where I live
    Give back more- people are incredible
    Write more letters
    Stay motivated
    Positive Visualization
    Prepare for 2012

-Long Term:
    Practice the policy of no regrets
    Race at an elite level
    Live in Oregon, Wyoming, or California
    Train with the right attitude
    Connect to the ones I love again (Family and Melissa Buckley, I freaking miss you)
    Prepare for hard times
    Do something worthy of getting a tattoo about it**

Now I can't write down goals without finding ways to aim for them. These are just as important as my goals.
  
Ways to achieve my goals:   
-Make time for things= friends, recovery, eating right, balance, love
-Understand that my actions lead to my happiness and how I choose to live life
-Smile
-Do 10 push ups any time I say sorry
-Quit my lack of confidence and my fear of pressure
-Hold my self accountable
-Set out with a mission for every day
-Journal more, write down how the time is passing
-Create a budget (time to understand how grown-ups spend money)
-Find inspiration in life, draw from it
-Practice visualization and use it well
-Get in the GYM
-Want to be SORE
-Run like a demon, race like a god, and pray like a saint
-Keep the mantras coming....

Now I know I am getting pretty self involved here. I don't normally like to state my goals so openly. I certainly have some pinned up only in my head and heart, but there are some that just help to be typed out.

Re-evaluation is a good thing and reminds us all what we want from life.

**Note- I am not sure if I actually want a tattoo. I just want to do something that I could say was deserving of getting a tattoo for it. One of those life moments that make you want to remember the experience in some way :)